


where's my love?

by wolfsbanex



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Affection, Boys In Love, Fluff, Forgiveness, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, Light Angst, Love Confessions, M/M, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-16
Updated: 2017-04-16
Packaged: 2018-10-19 21:03:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 710
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10648014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wolfsbanex/pseuds/wolfsbanex
Summary: That's what people do who love you.They put their arms around youand love you when you're not so lovable.OR Magnus and Alec re-connect after an argument.





	where's my love?

**Author's Note:**

> ENGLISH ISN'T MY FIRST LANGUAGE!  
> \- this is incredibly fluffy.  
> \- enjoy!<3

The terror of being judged sharpens the memory: it sends an inevitable glare over that long-unvisited past which has been habitually recalled only in general phrases. Even without memory, the life is bound into one by a zone of dependence in growth and decay; but intense memory forces a man to own his blameworthy past. With memory set smarting like a reopened wound, a man’s past is not simply a dead history, an outworn preparation of the present: it is not a repented error shaken loose from the life: it is a still quivering part of himself, bringing shudders and bitter flavors and the tinglings of a merited shame.

Magnus is sitting on the floor, his knees drawn to his chest and a drink in his hand. He wishes Alec was here. He hated fighting with his boyfriend, especially because of stupid reasons. His head lolled back against the cold leather and he closes his eyes.

A void in his chest was beginning to fill with anger. Quiet, defeated anger that guaranteed him the right to his hurt, that believed no one could possibly understand that hurt.

It was Alecs fault this argument escalated, Magnus decides and sips on his whiskey. He was the one who started it and he hadn’t let himself getting calmed down, no matter how many comforting words he had given to the shadowhunter. Alec just stared back, his eyes dull and almost dead. Then he had slammed the door shut.

It’s later that night when Alec returns, his eyes red and puffy and his wet hair sticking to his face. He looked like a lost puppy someone had abandoned at the side of a road, but Magnus just looked into the TV in front of him, acting interested in the black dress a blonde girl was showing.

She looked awful, the pale skin making her look sick in the dark dress and Magnus rolls his eyes in annoyance at her fashion taste. Alec leans against the door, his arms crossed. Then he opens his mouth.

„I'll understand if you don't want me anymore. But I will be heartbroken. You are all I ever dreamed of and hoped for. You are much, much more. Please know that I didn't think I was mean-minded. But I realize I am. I don't want you to put your arms around me and say it's all right, that you forgive me. I want you to be sure that you do, and my love for you will last as long as I live. I can see no lightness, no humour, no joke to make. I just hope that we will be able to go back to when we had laughter, and the world was coloured, not black and white and grey. I am so sorry for hurting you. I could inflict all kinds of pain on myself, but it would not take back any I gave to you.“

Alecs words were so sincere, so full of sadness and regret, almost grief, that Magnus felt his eyes burn. Magnus turns away from Alec. The shadowhunter must see his shaking shoulders, because two hands grab him after a few seconds.  
As Alec helped him up, the shadowhunter felt him shake all over, so Magnus asked him to forgive, without knowing what for, but that was his lot, asking forgiveness, he even asked forgiveness of himself for being what he was, what it was his nature to be.

When Magnus turns around, Alec cups his face in his hands and he kisses Magnus so deeply that he didn't know who is breathing for who, but Alecs mouth and tongue taste like warm honey. Magnus didn't know how long it lasts, but when Alec lets go of him, he misses it already.

„You are what happiness means to me. And I would rather have today with you than forever with anyone else.“ Magnus whispers into Alecs hair. The shadowhunter places his hands on Magnus back and draw him closer, against Alecs chest, so their bodies where intertwined and Magnus was surrounded by Alecs love and warmth. The warlock felt safe and he smiles softly.

That's what people do who love you. They put their arms around you and love you when you're not so lovable.

**Author's Note:**

> i'd be very thankful for kudos and comments! :)


End file.
